Alopecia vulva

My hair loss started a year ago. It began behind my ears, on the top of my head, later my legs and after just two months I had lost all hair on my body. Except on my vulva. I was later diagnosed with Alopecia, an autoimmune disease. Before this, I never thought about my femininity but after this I gave it a lot of thought. All I wish for is for my hair to grow back, and because of this I have decided to not shave the hair on my vulva. Since I figured out how much the hair meant for my femininity and sexuality, how can I then shave off the only hair I have left?

X – 23 years old

I LOVE MY NON BINARY TRANS BODY

As a trans person, I was lead to believe I was born 'in the wrong body', as if I had to want a penis and hate my vulva. My past experiences with non-consensual sex have also lead me to feel insecure about my parts. However, over time I have learned to reclaim my body and transitioning has also enabled me reconnect with myself in ways which have helped me grow stronger every day. Taking testosterone has changed the appearance of my genitals, my clitoris grew larger and its texture become rougher. I love the fluidity and versatility of my body, as I can adapt it as I go through life.

I love my non binary trans body.

M – 21 years old

SOMETIMES I SHAVE, SOMETIMES I DON'T

When I examined my body more closely at primary school age, I was able to talk to my mother about my vulva. It was never a taboo subject for me. But when the first pubic hair grew I probably started to shave pretty soon after, influenced by the media. One of my ex-boyfriends insisted quite a lot on it.

Fortunately, my partner today doesn't care and so do I. Sometimes I shave, sometimes, especially in autumn and winter, I often let my hair grow for a while until it starts annoying me.

V – 26 years old

SOFT, NURTURING, POWERFUL

For a long time I was quite self conscious and squeamish of my vulva. I didn't know what was 'normal' or what any one else's looked like. It was all a bit of a mystery down there for me. I got more and more uncomfortable with my vulva when it came to pubic hair, my period, my sex life and unexpected changes that sometimes occurred.

Not long ago I read a book called 'Manhood : The Bare Reality' by Laura Dodsworth. This book is a series of 100 photographs of penis's alongside personal stories of what each persons penis means to them. The diversity was amazing and the stories so insightful. Reading the book made me consider more my relationship with my own body and my vulva, as well as wondering what a vulva equivalent of the same book would look like. I think it's so so important for people to have these conversations around such taboo topics as they are often so engrained and connected with a persons body confidence and how they see themselves and relate with their own body.

Seeing the vulva gallery has been really inspiring for me. It makes us see that each vulva is a beautiful and unique artwork in its own right. It takes away the secrecy and the embarrassment and celebrates openness, honesty and diversity. Vulvas are our first soft, nurturing, creative, powerful, mystical beautiful gateway into this world and owning one is something to be proud of. I am now full of self love and admiration for my vulva.

P – 27 years old

SLOWLY STARTING TO ACCEPT MY OWN

At age fifteen my vulva changed. For me it was a dramatic change, which ruined many years of my life. I don’t know how many tears I have cried, but I guess I could fill up a swimming pool. I have struggled with an eating disorder for fifteen years, and mentally from age fifteen until today (at thirty-six years old) because of my issues. When I started being sexually active, I cried every time I had sex with a new partner, and my issues have ruined a lot of my relationships, because of my hang-ups regarding my vulva. None of the guys/girls I’ve had sex with have ever said anything but positive things, but in my head there is something wrong with my vulva. And I have always believed that everyone else thinks the same way I do. I have never ever seen a woman in real life with long inner labia, so I thought it was just me. My current boyfriend has really pushed my limits regarding my vulva, and I hated him for that for a long time. He says that he really loves it, and I want to believe him! I have always found long inner labia very sexy, but I hated my own. There are so many beautiful vulvas in The Vulva Gallery, so I’m slowly starting to accept my own. But I have a long way to go. The Vulva Gallery: thank you!

M – 36 years old

I AM A WORK OF ART

Living in a society that glorifies a certain type of what they would call a "perfect body" made me hate myself. When I was little, people around me would ask what the favourite part of our body was and my friends would immediately have an answer, but I never knew what to say because I had never seen any part of my body as beautiful, especially not the parts that were usually hidden. Growing up seeing all those beautiful people in the media and later seeing naked girls in porn put an unattainable ideal in my head and made me think looking like them was the only way I could ever look normal, let alone beautiful. A few years ago, I came across the Vulva Gallery on Instagram and while some may think it is a strange concept, all I could think of was how beautiful every single one of the portraits were. Funny thing is, all the vulvas there looked different and none of them looked like the ones I thought mine was supposed to look like. And all of those painted vulvas looked perfect. Seeing something that wouldn't normally be perceived as beautiful through a work of art made me realise what beautiful actually was about. Beautiful is everywhere. Looking at my body through art helped me understand how much beauty there is in this world that we are not even aware of. If you take a moment and look around you, or simply look at yourself, you will realise how much beauty there is in and around you that you had never even seen before. There are no rules in beauty. There is no such thing as an ideal of a perfect body. Every body is different and beautiful. I am beautiful in my own way. Because I am a work of art and so is every single one of you.

E – 19 years old

CONFIDENCE IN MYSELF

I have a vulva type that is typically shown in sexual health education images. Therefore the shape of my vulva was never something I really thought of. However because I didn’t really think about it, I also didn’t know what it could do. I didn't know women could masturbate until I was around 20 – I thought it was just a guy thing. When I found out, I spent a summer in my bedroom getting to know my body and what felt good. This gave me a certain confidence in myself, in my body, and in my vulva – she's perfect as she is. Following The Vulva Gallery has shown me more beautiful individuals with their beautiful vulvas that make them feel good too (I hope beyond all hopes)! You're doing an amazing thing and making the world a better, more loving place.

E – 27 years old

LEARNING HOW TO LOVE MY VULVA

From an early age I’ve been made fun of for my vulva. It’s not ‘neat’ and tucked in and a little meaty. I’m a stripper, and I’m just learning how to love my vulva. I will never get surgery and I want women to grow to love their outie vulvas.

E – 25 years old

BE PROUD

To all the people out there, no matter what you got "down there" appreciate it! Because it is unique and very beautiful. Take care of your body and especially of your sensitive genitals. Be proud of that part of you and keep it healthy! 🐣♥️

H – 18 years old

NO ONE SHOULD PRESSURE ME TO LOOK A CERTAIN WAY

Growing up, I was a very precocious child. I relished reading puberty books in secret, learning how my body was changing, and what to expect. Then one day I worked up the courage to use a mirror and see what I looked like down there, for I realized I had no idea. As silly as it may sound, this incidence made me believe I was secretly deformed. One labia was longer than the other, and purple, too. Which convinced me that my flesh was rotting and that I could be seriously ill. I became insecure and unhappy with how my love parts looked. I thought boys would be ashamed, too if they knew what it looked like. That it wasn't symmetrical and skinny or tight.

My relationship with myself became even more complicated as I grew up and into my sexuality. I felt inadequate, impotent. That I didn't really know myself or how to be pleased or what I enjoyed. In my family it is forbidden to even use tampons. I felt immature in comparison to my classmates and friends who knew what sex was like and even just how to insert tampons.

Since then, I've developed a better relationship with myself. Now I realize no one should pressure me to look a certain way, because who I am is enough. I'm still learning about body diversity and trying to heal from an abusive relationship, but thanks to communities like The Vulva Gallery, I've come to better appreciate the human body in all its wonderful colors, shapes, and sizes. Thank you all for giving me an outlet to share my story.

M – 18 years old

MY PUBIC HAIR ROCKS

I had a lot to say in this little blurb. I was going to explain how terrified I was the first time I shaved my legs, how for years the amount of body hair I had depended on what somebody else said about it. Sometimes I'll look at my fingers and laugh because I used to shave my knuckles, thinking that girls shouldn't have hairy fingers. I am a woman. I will grow whatever hair I want, whenever I want, and I've recently come to realize that no matter what I choose, I am still me. Right now, I'm growing out my pubic hair... and it rocks.

B – 21 years old

VULVAS ARE AMAZING YET UNDERRATED

I am a comedian and I use my stand up mostly to talk about feminism, sex and slut shaming. I love to make people laugh, and I hope to make them think while they do. I touch many topics, including... vulvas! Vulvas are amazing yet underrated. Everybody talks about the vagina, but the external part is way more fun! And beautiful. It breaks my heart that some women are ashamed of their vulva. I’m not! And that’s why I’m so happy to be part of The Vulva Gallery. We need more projects like this.

C – 30 years old

IT'S THEIR PROBLEM AND NOT MINE :)

I've always had a complicated relationship with my longer inner labia, I think mostly because I started discovering my sexuality very young and I felt dirty when seeing my friends who weren't sexually active yet. But I discovered third wave feminism and body-/sexuality positivity as a teenager and it allow me to progressively change my vision of my body and myself. I still have a few complexes but I feel much better in my body now! I even stopped wearing bras and make up and shaving a few months ago. I never felt better with my body and instead of trying to change myself for others, I started to think that if someone has a problem with my looks, it's their problem and not mine!

Thank you so much for doing what you're doing, and I hope it will help others to feel better with themselves!

M – 22 years old

YOUR FLAWS ARE WHAT MAKE YOU YOU

I’m very self conscious of my body. Especially after having kids, everything changed.. including my vulva. I don’t know why my clitoris got bigger after giving birth, but it definitely made me feel less feminine overall. I’m still working on feel comfortable in my own skin, but as I get older and will be moving into my 30s, I’ve realized what is actually important in life! I truly believe everyone is beautiful and your flaws are what make you, you!

K – 28 years old

EMBRACING MY NATURAL HAIR

For years I completely removed the hair from my vulva. Initially I was asked to do it by my partner at the time, however it became habit and I continued the practice after we broke up.  I’ve recently started to let my hair grow back and I feel so good about it! I have a beautiful woman in my life who loves my vulva unconditionally, which has given me the confidence to embrace my natural hair growth and keep her in whichever way makes me most happy :)

A – 34 years old

FINALLY MAKING PEACE WITH MY VULVA

I've always had anxiety and insecurities over my body and my vulva since I was a teenager. I have always had the feeling and worry that something may be wrong with the way I look down there and have often questioned my partners over how I look there, asking if I look 'normal' and how I compare to other women they know. I once had one boyfriend add to my insecurities by laughing and saying my vulva was 'droopy' compared to others. Since then I became preoccupied with the notion that mine was weird looking.

I've been very hesitant to share this but I'm coming to a time in my life where I feel like I am finally making peace with my vulva and learning to love and accept myself just the way I am.

I would be honoured to be a part of your gallery. Thank you!

H – 30 years old

YOU'RE NOT ALONE

I'm nineteen years old and sometimes I feel like I'm alone with my insecurities, I haven't met somebody who suffers with acne and colouration on her vulva and inner thighs, it makes me feel like I’m not sensual or capable of having sex, I'm afraid of someone watching me naked because of my pimples, I'm trying my best to feel better about it, so if you have the same as me, you're not alone, we can't be the only people in the world with that, right?

I also have a big vulva because I'm also big, so I guess it has some logic. Every time I try to look at porn I see the same kind of girls with different sizes and everything but with ‘perfect’ vulvas, it's almost like a mould and instead of making me feel good or horny, I usually get sad and frustrated about it because I’m struggling with the complete opposite.

K.R. – 19 years old

LIKE A CHEEKY TONGUE

Here’s my vulva, it’s like a cheeky tongue sticking out! It’s usually all covered up with thick pubic hair, but I shave probably once a year just to say hello (and then the itchiness and ingrown hairs remind me why I don’t usually bother!). My long frilly labia have never bothered me, but I’ve always wished my clitoral hood was a bit more tucked away. Then I hear stories of women who have had genital cosmetic surgery and lost some – or all – sensation, which I think is so terrifying it’s not worth the risk at all. Luckily none of my sexual partners have ever said anything to make me feel negative or self-conscious about my vulva. I’m still learning to love my clitoral hood after many phases of insecurity, influenced by the overwhelming promotion of cosmetic surgery that comes up in the search results for ‘large clitoral hood’. But I would rather come to terms with my vulva than let our societal beauty ideals push me to self-mutilation. This page is so liberating for those of us who spent many years wondering if we’re ‘normal’ – thank you!

Anonymous – 25 years old

WHAT AN ORDINARY VULVA LOOKS LIKE

I have always been shy when it comes to my private parts, and since I was young, I have felt alone feeling that I look different. Growing up and becoming an adult, made me change the way I looked at it. All of us are and looks different, and that is okay. It is so important to me that everyone feel good about themselves and that everyone can see what an ordinary vulva looks like. There is nothing to be ashamed of, because we are all beautiful, just the way we are.

– C.

WE ARE ALL HUMAN BEINGS

I have always felt self-conscious and somewhat embarrassed about my vulva, mainly the labia (lips) as they're longer and darker than what's deemed as 'normal' and 'sexy' in society. The media, especially porn, completely distorted my brain into thinking I had a disgusting body and that I wasn't good enough for anyone, it made me believe I was unattractive, undesirable and worthless. I understand now that it is a completely fake and twisted platform for hooking and brainwashing innocent people into thinking the same stuff I do, for the eventual gain of profit. I have never really let anyone see or touch my body because of how much I've been made to hate it.

My current partner has opened his eyes to the truth on how women have been treated throughout history and made to feel everyday (not that men do not stuffer but I am talking about females for now) and he is no longer a slave to the illusion. The stupid illusion of this perfect (alien) female form that's only here for men's pleasure. He gave up watching porn and he feels amazing for it. He now considers himself a feminist and he's made me feel loved and wanted and continues to help me grow every day. I have a long way to go on the path to self-love and self-confidence but he has helped me so much. We are all human beings, let's stop pretending that we're not.

G – 26 years old