I'd like to share my vulva story from the point of view of a non-binary person :)
I never really hated my pussy, I was never insecure about it, I never compared my vulva to other vulvas... because I for a very long time felt no connection whatsoever. I never really noticed it. Never did I wonder what was down there, how it looks like, tastes like or smells like. However, upon discovering the bliss of masturbation, I noticed something else emerge: fear and shame. Fear of my vulva. I didn't dare to touch it! I discovered a quick and effective method to satisfy myself without the need of touching whatever was down there. And shame for being sexual in some way, for wanting to feel pleasure.
Those feelings continued to dwell in the back of my mind as I played and pleasured myself. Some time passed and I began questioning my sexuality and gender. I identified as asexual, and no longer was I a girl, rather non binary. This, while helping me feel more free and more like myself, created an even greater distance in connecting with my vulva.
It wasn't until, with the help of a friend, I took a step out of my comfort zone and a step closer to my vulva. I began to open up, I dared to touch my vulva and discover it's hills and valleys, delicate crevasses and sensitive peaks. I slowly started to form a bond with my forbidden garden. Through masturbation, I connected even more with myself and my sexuality flourished and evolved (my asexuality naturally changed into pansexuality, both of which are valid). Nonetheless, I began to struggle with the notion that vulva equals woman, and that menstruation equals woman. With small steps and long nights of talking with myself, I let go of that thought and my vulva no longer was a body part of a woman. It became a part of me, spiritually and physically. I also became fascinated by my menstrual cycle, learning to see it as something natural and beautiful, the complete opposite of what society teaches us.
After a long journey, I evolved to be sexually open and fearless, in love with my vulva, with my menstrual cycle, with myself. I have fully accepted my gender, my sexuality, my vulva, all of me. All along I was a flower bud waiting to blossom... And with time, patience and love, I did.
C. - 19 years old